Hello brothers and sisters! SO to help with this dying to myself daily, I am going to journal the journey.
Parenting is one of those hands on things that we have to do and at times we would really like to be hands on. It is also the hardest thing ever and if you are trying to break habits, your kids can break you if you allow it. On a normal everyday basis they can hurt our feelings and make us want to cry. Now add the extra stress of letting go of a crutch you have been leaning on for a while… and it is almost as if it was planned…
Perhaps it was. C.S Lewis wrote a book titled; The Screwtape Letters. In this book are a collection of writings in the form of one demon speaking with a younger demon on how to derail his human from ever finding Christ and coming to the knowledge of the Truth. In the book Screwtape is an older demon and his nephew,Wormwood, was given his first assignment and is writing to his Uncle for help.
All you get to know are Screwtape’s replies to his nephew and the instruction on how to handle the human and what kinds of traps to lay out for him if he should ever come to know Jesus. This way, though converted, he is no threat. Every interesting take on the whole matter. A satire if you will about the thoughts of the enemy forces. I highly recommend the book. So after reading/listening to this book, I figure it most definitely is a war effort that is launched at every believers family.
Behold, I send you forth as sheep in the midst of wolves: be ye therefore wise as serpents, and harmless as doves.
Brother Voddie says babies are not little angels but rather little vipers in diapers and I would have to agree with him. I have seen a lot of children brought into this world and all of them were little, bitty, adorably, cuddly baby narcissists. They want what they want and even the kindest child still does not want to give up the last cookie or share their favorite toy. They don’t care that you have not had enough sleep or if you bathed or brushed your hair. They. Don’t. Care.
I do apologise to any older children that may have been offended by this statement but I cannot take it back. I was a viper once too, that’s how I can recognize it.
The point is that all of us have a lil’ narc running around inside of us if we have not put that little brat in time out. We need to first take them to Jesus so He can put us back together the right way. Renew our minds in His word. Then, take that lil child and set them down and help them heal from all the nonsense the world, the flesh and the devil have done.
Over time they learn empathy from us as we shower them in it. They learn compassion and understanding from us as well and from others. But when they are first brought into this world, they are selfish. Granted they don’t understand that they are, they are innocent in all of this. All they know is that they need you to stop the discomfort. Later in life they will learn to love us but not at first. They learn to love you because you have always been there. We teach them to love us when they are little.
1 John 4:19
We love him, because he first loved us.
Scripture says that we first loved Him (the Father) because He first loved us. This verse is perfectly illustrated to us in our children. If we didn’t have the discernment to pick up on that sooner, we will once we have children or have a child live with us. And this lesson may take years for us to understand… only the Lord knows and that understanding will come right when it will do the most good.
It hit me with Jesus first, then my husband and then my children. It even went down to my friends and other relationships. I love Jesus and the Father because the Father first loved me. Same for my husband, he loved me first, and my cat… yeah, he loved me first. I love my children and I want them to love me in return and they do. However, is that love unconditional on my part?
For Better – Yes, these are the good times, the memories that bring smiles to our faces and warm our hearts and they are covered.
Or Worse – Manipulation, lies, adultery, and so on… these are the things we want to run from not face but they are covered as well. I do not believe in staying in a relationship that is abusive or unsafe. Marriage is a couple by couple thing, not something you can lump together, a one-size fits all it is not.
In Sickness – Don’t be a monkey butt and leave your spouse due to health issues that come up… they are covered too.
In Health – I find it interesting that two negative aspects of marriage are sandwiched between positives. This is also covered.
Til Death Do We Part – Well, you’re not dead yet so… Covered.
This is not an easy thing we are called to do but then again, neither was Jesus called to an easy task but it is worth it, to stick it out and work through things. You both grow in the process and learn from your mistakes and failures and you’re not alone. It is the perfect picture of the Father and the Church.
It’s the same for our children, they are the closest to us and can hurt us the most AND they are covered under our love and protection. However, if my love for them has conditions, whether or not I see them for what they are, then my love for them is not pure. If my attitude towards my spouse or children changes because they are not behaving the way I want them too, or performing the way I want, it has conditions. This is a hard word for most of us because we are human. They say the road to hell is paved with good intentions and I know that I have held conditions over my family without knowing and some knowingly and I acknowledge my sin before God and I say all of that to say this:
Unconditional love is giving of yourself to prosper someone else. This is exactly what Jesus did for us on the cross. This is what we are to do for first our husbands and then our children. We don’t live for ourselves, everything goes to them. This is even the reason we keep ourselves healthy. We need to be there for our children and we can’t do that if we are not healthy enough to do so. SO a run down of my day…
No Solitude: The ones we care for do not seem to need the same amount of “me” time. I know we need it but remember, we are their world. We are everything to them.
Retarded Bickering: We have all been in public, a blood chilling scream vibrates through your entire body. “Not my kids.” I would say… This is actual footage of my children “playing” (it is really fighting unless I ask)… the ones on the bottom.
Silence Is Deadly: Only it sounds like this. I walked in the other day and they were both silently pinching, hitting and making horrid faces at one another… it quickly and silently went south and they commenced strangling one another… no sound was made, not a peep! Who does this?! I am both concerned and amused.
Helping Hands: AND when did chores and housework become death sentences? Sometimes I ask my sweet angel children for help just to watch their mood change. It’s like a light switch only with emotions.
Today is day two of three days dead and I am doing as well as the fellow in this meme. No, honestly, the Lord is good and letting go of cigarettes has not been as hard as I thought it would be. It has not been easy and I admit I have failed and smoked one over the course of the day and will probably smoke another before I go to bed…maybe. The kids are loving it, they are having a lazy daisy day cause mom, she is suffering from No-nicotine-nitis… and selfing has been hard enough without full on mothering… Its a sick day.
So, until next I write brothers and sisters, I pray the Lord watches over each of you as the day moves forward and that you be filled with His peace and joy. That every thing you are up against will shape you into the person God intended for you to be. Come what may… Follow after Jesus! As always, beloved families, stay peculiar!
Feel free to like and share this if the Lord leads you to do so and feel free to comment below, I would love to hear how you are doing and what wonderful things the Lord has been teaching you in these strange days.
Thank you for sharing 😊
Never underestimate the authority of a child
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They are a handful that is for sure
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